5 Ways to Support Your Child Emotionally

By JoAnn Schauf

More than a year into this pandemic, we are tired of hearing the words uncertainty, new normal, and lost year. Worse, we’re exhausted from the limitations of living in it. Still, this is not the time to stop extending extra support and understanding to each other. Boosting mental health and emotional wellbeing is needed more than ever.

Lifting the darkness from over-exposure

It’s been nearly impossible to avoid the daily COVID stats in the media. The contentious presidential battle, racism, riots, shootings, fires, cancellations, and shortages fuel tension and trauma. On the one hand, we are emotionally drained and feel powerless over these events. But on the other hand, we have choices about what and how much we consume and how we process it. I’m not advocating denying reality: I’m saying it’s possible to reduce our anxiety and stress levels by limiting the attention we give negative news and choosing refreshing content that connects us to joy and awe. Your child’s barometer for recognizing when enough is enough is not as attuned as yours. We can check in on their content and respond to it. It is difficult to feel safe when chaos appears to be everywhere: talking about it will ease their worries and mood.

Getting your routines back

We lost the mojo that structure brought. Kids fell into college-like hours – staying up later and longer. No wonder they were reticent to show their tired faces on screen or change out of their sleep attire. We all function better with order and organization: it’s calming and certain. Help your children, and perhaps, you, too, re-establish hygiene, get-up, and bedtime routines, reduce frequent bedroom snacking, and increase the meals you eat together. If you feel resistance, click here to review the steps to collaborating. Your kids want a say in how their world works.

Being heard

We often think we have to have the solutions for our children’s problems. Sometimes this is true – but very often, being present to listen to them without judgment, drilling, or lecturing is what they need most. Knowing you have their back is quite meaningful. An empathetic response or a sympathetic ear makes them feel understood. And that they are not alone. Click here for Empathetic Statements. Remember, visiting them in their rooms without an agenda is lovely for both of you.

Changing things up

Because you’ve always done things, a certain way doesn’t limit your ability to evoke change. Sharing the best and worst moments of the day can be added to your dinner table conversation. One reminds us that good is happening, and the other foster resilience and problem-solving. Sharing personal gratitude – as easy as blue skies, finding a missing phone charger or a kind word from a friend – boosts serotonin, and we all love that! Being outside in nature breathes life into us. It may be the year you plant an herb or vegetable garden. And, if your space is cluttered, you may want to channel Marie Kondo.

Taking a page from your flight attendant

Before taking off, we’re reminded: put your mask on first. This means taking self-care seriously. We have all experienced dark days over the last year but staying in that abyss is risky. If your emotional welling being or mental health has fallen below normal, I urge and encourage you to get help. The same goes for getting help for your children. Adolescents have taken a substantial developmental hit as their quest for autonomy and independence was interrupted entirely. Getting help is a strength. Do it now, waiting and hoping it will improve unaided is like thinking a broken leg will heal well without treatment. There’s no reason to suffer when life begs to be lived.

I want to commend you for all you’ve done leading your family over the last year! I’m an email away to help you.

©JoAnn Schauf, MS, LLC Your Tween & You  2021 All rights reserved